Sunday, January 30, 2005

I did it, I voted

YES,YES, I did it. I have the courage to do it.

victory
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Monday, January 24, 2005

Days before the Elections

Well, this post will be the last one I write before the elections. I don’t know if I will be able to make any connection to the internet in the next few days.

We had a water problem for about 4 days. some terrorists destroyed one of the main pipe lines that supply water to Baghdad. Half of the city was without water (about 2 million people). It is a very big pipeline about 2 meters in diameter and 10 meter below the ground. They have put explosions in the man hall and simply blew it. The explosion made a lake of water about 6 km in Diam. I was told by one of the engineers who was working in fixing that pipe. They fixed it now but they are not sure if it will withstand the pressure of water because they did not change the pipeline, the engineer said it will probably take months if this fixing failed. Till now it is working. we had another 50 man halls along that major pipe and I’m afraid that they might be targeted. I did not hear anything about it in the news.

The last few days, we did not have water, but we were much better than the others, we have a low tap in the garden where we can have water from time to time especially at night when most of the people are sleeping, so we used to have water in buckets and used them in the morning for washing dishes, clothes and cleaning the house and the most important thing the toilet. we usually drink mineral water (that is we don’t use tap water for drinking), the first day of the problem my husband went to buy some water for emergency but he couldn’t get any because most of the people bought it, but he bought water the next day on his way to work. I used to heat the water and then make a mix of cold and hot water so I can wash the dishes. I hated this operation very much. it started only two days before Eid, a great gift! I gave a bath to my daughter by heating the water and then put it in a bowel, she was so happy, and she told me to wash her in that way every time instead of the shower.
Other people’s situation was worse than ours. Some people did not have water at all. One of the persons I know very well, told me that she was drying the wet clothes (that had pee on them) for her 2 months old baby on the heater and then made her baby wear them again because she did not have water to wash them.

Although we had a good time in Eid, the first day of Eid all my husband’s family gathered in my parents in law house, also with no water, so we had lunch in plastic dishes to throw them away instead of washing them.
The next day I spent it with my parents. The third day, the weather was so rainy and windy, but nevertheless we went to have lunch in a nearby restaurant with some relatives.
The fourth day we were invited to lunch at my husband’s uncle house.
Tomorrow we will go for shopping to have some supplies since we will have something similar to a curfew for three days, we are not sure what is going to happen during and after the elections so we have to be take care of everything. Some shop owners said that tomorrow (Tuesday) will be the last day to open.

As for my husband, he will go to work till Tuesday and then he will be at home till after the elections. The day before Eid and they day before it, he was lucky to stay safe. Last Tuesday a car bomb exploded at the end of AL-Jadirayh bridge that was targeting one of the Islamic shiat party, my husband was in his car crossing that same bridge, that day he did not get up early and was late for about 10 min. so he was lucky to stay safe, he called me with his mobile and told me that he was Ok and he saw the explosion but he did not get hurt.
The next day another car bomb exploded on his way too, near the Australian embassy but again he was lucky to be alive.
Today, we went to a supermarket that we used to make shopping from, and we found it partially blown up. I don’t know why, it was only a super market.
The electricity was good when we did not have water, we had 3 hours elect. for every 3 hours off. but now we have one hour elect. for every 5 hours off. It seems that we can’t have all the basic things in life at one time.


Monday, January 17, 2005

The North, Eid, and Elections

My husband went to Sulaimanyia (Kurdistan, in the north of Iraq) for business, so I had to sit alone with my daughter here. It was very hard to me and him, but he could not take me since he will be so busy with his work besides the weather is very cold now in the north, he said he saw snow on the top of the mountains.
I usually get depressed every time he travel for work, he used to travel outside Iraq every year for work and stay out for at least a couple of weeks and sometimes more. This time it is different, not far away from me, and not too long only few days, but it’s still very hard. The situation we have, makes me unable to leave the house alone, besides I was so worried about him till he called me and told me that he arrived safe.

We will celebrate Eid Al-Adha next Friday which lasts for four days. It’s similar to the one we had two moths ago. In this Eid we celebrate the people who went for pilgrimage in Mecca. I don’t think it will be good Eid, things are very tense here.

As for my sister in Mosul, well they got sick from the bad situation they have, her daughter could not had one of her exams two days ago. and today she went but she couldn’t return back. she stayed at school till the headmaster managed to take her back home. My sister wishes to come to Baghdad but my parents are afraid from the road and they told her it’s better to stay in your house than to have the risk of traveling to here. and I don’t know what will she do.

The only thing that I did as a preparation for Eid is buying some candies to serve them with the coffee. and I bought clothes to my daughter, I don’t want her to feel that a bad thing is happening in Eid. my parents will not have Eid since my grandma died only recently, our traditions prevent us from that. the first Eid after a person dies should not be celebrated, I mean they don’t go out to visit friends, the friends visit my parents and wish them the end of all sorrows and my parents serve them coffee only with no candies or pastries. Women who are relative to the dead person should wear black clothes for at least 40 days. I hate to see people wear black clothes it reminds me of death. Also my father hates to see my mother wearing black clothes all the time, It is his mother who died but the traditions force my mother to wear the black clothes. For me I love my granny very much but I did not wear any black clothes, this will never bring her back to life again. some people wear black clothes for the loss of their beloved ones for a year or more, especially if that person was young. now you can see many women wearing black clothes, many young men are dying every day.

Well I hate to speak about death. that’s enough, lets change the subject.
My daughter was eager to see her father back home, she asked him to bring her three things from Sulaimaniya, a mobile phone and it was hard for us until we convinced her to buy her a mobile toy. and a gift (she left it to her father to decide) and candies. When her father kissed her goodbye to travel, she kissed him three kisses, he asked her why only three give me some more, she said I only asked you three things!!!!. Well today he returned back, he had a good time there. He brought her what she wanted. she was so happy.
About the elections. I still wish to participate in it and I still think about it everyday, should I go? what if I die? who will raise my daughter after me and her father, we will go together. I hate to think that way, but still it’s impossible to have the elections in Baghdad and the Sunni triangle. I’m afraid of civil war between sunni and shia if the elections are going to be held in time. Shia clerics have their own list and they are working very well in advertising about it. I still don’t know who are on the other lists and what kind of people I’m going to vote for. they did not make any announcement about them in papers or TV they are afraid of being killed. Except Dr. Allawi’s list, whom I will not vote for, he couldn’t do anything for us till now so why should I vote for him.
For me, my decision till this moment is not to participate. I don’t think it worth to sacrifice my life for it, it will not make any difference and you will see. It will make things worse than before. when the Americans passed the government to DR. Alawi everyone wished that things would be better, because he is Iraqi, but things are still not, they became worse and now it is the same thing, we have many terrorists in our country and they will not leave us whether we have elections or not. and we are still not ready to defend our own country and we don’t have qualified people to do it. every thing is a mess here. Till now my balance goes to my family.

Friday, January 14, 2005

Mayonnaise and coffee Jar

I received this in an email, I liked it and I want you to share it with me.

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar....and the coffee..

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items tin from of him. when the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill with golf balls.

He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was. So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with an unanimous “yes”. The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed. “now” said the professor, as the laughter subsided ,”I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life”.

The golf balls are the important things- your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions things. that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your education, your house and your car.
The sand is everything else- the small stuff. If you put the sand into the jar first, there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. take your partner out to dinner. There will be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.
Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter. Set your priorties. The rest is just sand.
One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented, The professor smiled and said” It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there is always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend”.

Thursday, January 06, 2005

FROM BAD TO WORSE


It seems that we returned back to two years ago, just after Baghdad fall. we have a fuel problem for more than two months and it’s getting worse and worse, it’s affecting everything even the national electricity, which we used to have between 8-12 hours a day. now we have them only for 4 hours a day. we have 2 hours Elect. for every 10 hours off. Just like we used to had it 2 years ago.
We can’t operate the generator that long, not more than 3-4 hours and then we have to give it a rest, beside the fuel is very expensive in the black market. today we bought the 20 litter of fuel for 10000 ID while you could have the same quantity in the petrol station for 400 ID only!! but you have to be so patient that you can stand in the line for 12 hours. Yes, yes, yes, today I think for the length of the line of cars waiting in line it should take more than 12 hours to reach your turn, It’s more than 5 KM long!!!! I think It should be recorded in Gennis book for the record. The operator of our local generator which works on Diesel reduced the working hours because the fuel became very expensive and the owner said it’s tripled than before (two months ago) so he operates it for only 6 hours a day. the problem is not when you stayed with or without elec. the problem is with water you can’t operate the heater on the generator it needs a lot of energy the generator could not give it. the weather is cold and the water is freezing and you have to heat the water for many purposes. many of the house work can’t be done without elect. beside how can you explain that we don’t have elec’ to a 3 years old daughter when she wants to see her favorite cartoon!!.
things are not getting bad only for feul, but also in security. last Friday two hairdresser shops for females were blown up in my street at about 9 pm. nobody was in them but they had bad damage not only to them but also the shops near them. also some male hair dresser shops were exploded in other parts of Baghdad in the past days and they said the terrorist told them that they were doing some feminine things in their shops, not only cutting hairs. now I don’t know why they exploded the female shops. maybe they want us not to cut our hair and look like men!!!!!. I still don’t understand how these terrorists could escape while there are two police cars standing at each end of our street?. those criminals are acting just the way they like, every one hate anyone can go and kill him or blow up his house or shop. Now I don’t trust my government what did they do to us till now? NOTHING and the terrorists seem like they are getting control of the situation very well and not getting weak at all as we heard on TV, It’s all lies. I don’t know what they have done in Falluja beside of damaging the city.
In Mosul it’s getting worse also. two days ago there was a battle near my sister’s house for four hours. my sister said that her mother in law went to bring my sister’s daughter from school which is near to their house, and on her way back home a battle started in the middle of the day, near their school. Her mother in law and my niece were so terrified they couldn’t escape and the bullets were around them, all the houses near them were closed and nobody could open the door to them. they sat near a fence, till a small man in shop which was almost closed opened a little and a man shouted to them to come to his shop. the man was inside the shop hiding when he saw them sitting and my 6 years old niece were crying. some children could escape and came to the shop and the man closed it’s door. They stayed there for 3 hours. the children were so terrified and they were all crying. my sister’s father in law could not return to his house because all the area was closed, another strange man asked him if he lives in that area and could not enter it, when he answered yes, he invited him to his house and he was strange to him and he stayed there for 3 hours where they even served him lunch.
The terrorists as my sister said escaped. she wished they were caught, they were in two cars but they ran away.
I wonder what those gangs want from us, they only hurt us and I don’t think by bombing few shops or fuel pipes the Americans would leave us, there must be something else in their minds, if they have any.
I heard that the suicide bomber who exploded himself in the American camp in Mousil was not Iraqi, he was a medical student, from Saudi Arabia, studying in the capital of Suddan. I don’t think we have Iraqis suicide bombers it’s not our way and it has never been. All the major operations were made by terrorists who came from outside the country.

killing our police, our guards, destroying our infrastructure. They all made by those terriosts. maybe we have some of our ex-regime helping them in information. I don’t know how someone have all this hate against his own people. But still things are getting worse and I still don’t think that the elections will make any difference if they were held in time, and I still want the election to be postponed till the government could handle the situation in Baghdad and Mosul. Mosul is the second largest city in Iraq and they can’t neglected it in the elections. I asked all my family, relatives, friends if they will vote in the coming elections. all their answers were they wished very much but with these situation they could not. one of my relatives said he is not only afraid from bombing the centers of elections but he is afraid if someone sees him and knows his name or other information, he might hurt him or his family later on. The terrorists are threatening any person who will vote, that he might get killed.
So is it getting from BAD to WORSE or not?